Compose to Create

SilverElement · August 22nd, 2009, 03:19 am

Well, I've been working around lately on Finale NotePad, and I've created a few compositions that I wanted critiqued and thought, "Hey, this is the place!" This is one of my first times composing music, and I think I've gotten better at it in the past few years, so, I hope you enjoy.

P.S. Water Walking is a work in progress.

Nyu001 · August 22nd, 2009, 05:00 am

I just could look at first awakening's score. From what I am seeing, there are many things that you should learn. The piece looks totally random, like there was not thoughts put in it to make a coherent work. Would be good if you keep all very simple. Like just whole note chords and a melody, and to move forward from there.

SilverElement · August 22nd, 2009, 05:07 am

Well, these are definitely better than what I was writing three years ago. THAT was random. I had no sense of composition whatsoever, and considering I haven't taken any Musical Theory classes or anything of the like, I've been making a few pieces of progress, I suppose. Well, in comparison to a few years ago, at least.

Thanks for the tips all the same.

I'll post another after I take some consideration into those factors.

SilverElement · August 26th, 2009, 11:08 pm

Okay, well, I finished Water Walking, but I made it for Strings Orchestra. I hope you all enjoy.

I need to get this thing into a midi so that my school orchestra can hear it... ^^;;

Pezzelle · August 27th, 2009, 01:58 pm

Note: Strings Ensemble xD (That's just me being picky though)

Water Walking has it's good parts. I can see that you put a lot of work into thinking about how each instrument in the ensemble would call and respond to the others. However, there are times that it feels really random. Granted that this is among your first foray into composition I am going to be hard on you, but it is only to help you. (That is what the community exists for

)

That being said, Measures 1-13 I really enjoy. I think that it's actually quite a pretty theme and I like many of your harmonies. The piece has a very VERY contemporary feel.

After 13 there are many parts where it feels that the Viola and Cello parts seem to ramble. (For lack of a better word) It gives the harmony an almost disjointed feel. Choppy. (If you were going for disjointed though congrats

)

I REALLY like measures 17-18. Nothing much else to say, it sounds awesome.Also @ 18 perhaps change the first violin note to a dotted quarter so that the cello has a semi-solo with the moving eighths.

Measures 19-21 are good.
Measure 22 feels too random. Consider reworking the harmonies.

I like the key change @ measure 29 though my brain is dying and I can't quite tell which key it is. I want to say that it is E-minor, but you have lots of accidentals strewn about. I understand the limitations of notepad, but if you are enrolled in High School or even college the discounts on finale 2010 pro are amazing. Save your money and take full advantage.

Strange thing though. After the key change I like measure 50, but I'm more or less sure that it is just the key change of one of the measures I called random. IDK it works better in the new key

Everything else is more or less key change so the initial statements still stand.

One more thing, @ the ending measure maybe consider changing the ending notes to dotted halves, and then have the string bass move down to an E- natural it will resolve nicely.

I think that is everything really. When I get time I will look over your other pieces. Believe me when I tell you that there are many composers on this site far more qualified than myself to critique. Also remember that while not all criticism is positive, it can always be made positive if you learn from it.

Keep up the good work.

EDIT: Also, DYNAMICS. I can't stress enough that dynamics are necessary. Not every conductor can interpret without them, and when that happens your piece no longer sounds like your piece. Sort of... There is more to it than that, but remember to write in your dynamics.

SilverElement · August 27th, 2009, 06:09 pm

Thanks for all of the tips.

I went back and relistened, and I did find a lot of it random. the piece started off as a piano piece, but I felt like trying my hand at a full strings orchestra. I guess I just find it easier to make a melody on two instruments and then add on. Also, the song, initially written for piano, also started on G Major. I'll re-post the song after making an edits.

I know I can't please the entire crowd, but I want to see how the song goes with these tips. Thanks.

clarinetist · August 27th, 2009, 06:42 pm

A few brief suggestions (note that I didn't spend too much time on this, so I'm not going to get very specific):

From what I'm seeing on the score, I think that some of the double stops that you call for are not possible to be played.

At meas. 29, change the viola notes; it seems as though you're intending to switch to E minor, yet:

1) You're missing the 3rd (G nat.) of the chord.
2) The viola has a D there; if you intend to make it an Emin7, put at least a G nat. somewhere.

Also, avoid close-spacing chords in the lowest bass notes.

SilverElement · August 27th, 2009, 06:58 pm

I'm pretty sure I put a G natural for the second viola note at measure 29. I double checked and everything.

clarinetist · August 27th, 2009, 08:42 pm

Quote:

Originally Posted by SilverElement

I'm pretty sure I put a G natural for the second viola note at measure 29. I double checked and everything.

Sorry, I was wrong.

SilverElement · August 27th, 2009, 10:17 pm

It's all right. ^^

SilverElement · September 4th, 2009, 05:52 pm

Well, I've got some new compositions that I'd for y'all to hear.